“Your body did not change at all even though you had a baby.”

“Your body did not change at all even though you had a baby.” Says mostly every woman that sees my body. This is not true, and it cannot be, no matter what you do to look as you did before giving birth.

I’ve always had beautiful breasts, a full, perky C cup. I could wear any dress without a bra, and my friends often asked for photos of my breasts so that they could show them to their plastic surgeons as a reference… I’ve always been very comfortable in my body, never giving my breasts much thought. During my pregnancy, when my breasts grew so much, I simply did not even know where to fit them, on my small, ballet frame, they were sitting atop my baby bump. Yet, I still did not need to wear maternity clothes, but continued with my regular lingerie, and fashion, as I did with my daily workouts.

However, all this unquestioned familiarity with my breasts changed when I gave birth, or more precisely when I stopped breastfeeding. Suddenly the body change hit me hard. After a traumatising birth, and the violation of everything I was, as a woman deeply in touch with her body, post partum was for me, a lot about overcoming what was done to me during the birth. As a response, I got on a marathon to regain the control over my life and breastfeeding was a big part of “me being in charge”. Constant travels, and my crazy international life, made my breasts often so clogged and painful. I knew my breasts were suffering, but as mothers, we use our bodies to grow our children, and to me, breasts became nothing but my baby’s food source.

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